week-old dream served up sloppy.

I sent a Myspace message to my friend Mike saying that I had this dream in which he and another friend were in, spurring me to think of him in waking life, wondering how he was doing. I didn't, however, tell him what exactly the dream was, not that he asked to know anyway. But here is the scene:

There is a wide-open space, platform-like setting. Reminds me roughly of the backyard in my family's old home, but it is nowhere I've ever been to in waking life. It is much more spacious, designed in a more aesthetically modern concrete slab way, and has concrete steps and walls, unlike my family's old backyard. But it does feel like it is in the back of somewhere, not facing a street or a garden or buildings even. I vaguely recall some foliage and hill-ness, outside of the concrete...ness, which was probably what reminds me of the backyard.

Anyway, my friend D is sitting or standing on the lower part of this wide open, platform-designed space, talking to me, while Mike is holding me up with his arms, on the upper level of the platform. She is occupied in telling me about how she dumped her new boyfriend. I'm asking her, "New boyfriend? Is this the one I already know about or another new one?" I forget her answer in the dream, but she clarifies. She proceeds to tell me that she dumped him for such and such reasons, including that he called her "Tower" (because she is tall?) and made fun of or teased her about being vegetarian. I find this all funny when I think about it in waking life. At the same time, I wonder if she really did break up with her boyfriend, or if any of these dream details are relevant to reality (because she IS tall and vegetarian in waking life, so half of her dream character is reality-based*). Anyway, back to random, dream hang-out. During this whole time that I am interacting with D, listening to her and looking at her, Mike is standing close behind me holding me up by the arms--the whole time, without saying anything. I'm not certain that I need Mike's support, but it feels nice and is kinda fun to have Mike holding me up and dragging me around. I'm looking at D, thinking she must think we are acting strangely, but she is not at all thrown off by our behavior.

*While my dreams are not always a direct translation of reality, they are occasionally clairvoyant--but it is sometimes hard to discern whether the message of a dream is clairvoyant, complete crap, or something else altogether.

3 short dream clips: city in water, PhD in healing, & large animals

So this morning after I woke up, I realized I had a weird dream about a city that was built intentionally in the middle of a body of water (not sure if it was an ocean or a lake). It was a conglomeration of gray buildings, all fairly tall, closely grouped together and looked very technologically advanced. and then spanning the entire length of it (which wasn't very big) was a building that was sort of like the equivalent of a half-pipe, but it was clearly a curved building. it actually reminded me of the superman ride at magic mountain, like it went really high up into the air, higher than any of the other buildings and it was very dramatic looking. I remember thinking how scary it would be to be on the top floor, it was so high. and I also remember just knowing somehow that this city was reno. maybe because I was recently in lake tahoe. anywho, some underwater adventure took place involving swimming from something without getting caught or being seen. I was reading some sci-fi last night before falling asleep, which might explain the weird, futuristic setting. I don't remember the resolution of the dream though.

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then I had a dream about a friend of mine with whom I have fallen out of touch over the years, and even though we were really close growing up, we haven't spoken in at least a year, maybe longer. well I had a dream we were hanging out, and she told me that on top of her amazing life so far, she was going to go back to school. I asked if she meant to get her masters, and she said no, she was going to get her PhD in healing (which made sense in the dream). I got really jealous and started to compare myself to her and my life so far to hers and felt like a big old failure and loser. needless to say, I think I've got some buried issues there in terms of recognizing my uniqueness and not comparing myself to others!

I think being back in school after taking several years off is bringing up these issues of achievement for me. I felt kind of like a loser when I didn't go away to college right away like most of the kids from my high school, and I think I've held that against certain people and it has majorly affected our friendship(s). I don't know if this dream is trying to show me what I want (a PhD?!) or not to compare myself with others & hold their achievements against them. maybe both. or maybe it's telling me to accept myself as I am, and to appreciate all the things I've experienced by choosing a different path.

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finally, I had this dream the other night but kept forgetting about it somehow. this is a typical dream for me: it involves larger than life cute animals!! I don't remember the context at all, but I do remember there was a HUGE giant panda, he was bigger than a horse, actually about the size of an elephant, and I was snuggling on him!! I don't remember his name but I wish I did. anyway, I was ecstatic and didn't want to stop hugging him. and that's all I remember.

welcome, ashley! dream post

I actually had this dream/apparently slight "vision" last night about Ashley posting on this blog! I was really excited when I started this blog and even more eager for Ashley to post on it before I would share the link with others, since she and I had wanted to start a dream blog together. So, when she said she wanted to post a dream on the new blog, I checked it for maybe two days in a row, waiting for a new post from her. Then, last night I had this dream-vision thing in which I was checking the blog and it read that there were two new posts (not just my one)...and lo and behold, this morning I check the blog, and there are like 3 new posts from mi amiga buena!! Welcome, Ashley!

in case you didn't know, ugly betty is a feminist.

this morning I had a dream that I was kickin' it with the suarez family (I've been watching a lot of ugly betty!! y que?! it's so good!) and I don't remember if I WAS betty, or if I was just a family member, but hilda was there too. we were in the kitchen doing something or other and there were all these construction workers in the other room who were trying to take advantage of us because we were women! I think they were eating lunch and taking a break from whatever project they were working on. anywho, so I heard them talking about how we were stupid & didn't know anything about construction because we were women, or something mean & disrespectful like that, so I gave them a piece of my mind! which is significant to me because in real life I'm really bad at confrontation and telling people off, I would never normally do that to someone I don't know at all. but I told them something strong and badass, and threatened them with something pretty impressive because after that they shut up and ate their lunches in silence! it was a very proud moment, and betty & hilda both had my backs. haha, so random!!

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I also had a dream about the gossip (the band), and they were total ballers. like bling everywhere, expensive accessories (somehow I just knew), and they were doing some photo shoot with fancy, emaciated, barely-clad models. I think I was turned off by it, like 'oh, they've become such jerks now that they're famous.' I think it has something to do with mike telling me about how they were kind of condescending to this canadian band, fucked up, a couple of years ago. weird.

roly polys & worms?!

so the other night I had a dream where I was sleeping in my bed in the room I grew up in and it was like I kept trying to wake up but couldn't. I would open my eyes, but they were too heavy to stay open so I'd just end up falling asleep again. It was really stressful though & I really wanted to stay awake because there were bugs crawling on my ceiling! it was super gross. there was a roly poly, and it was walking across the ceiling and then it fell and then there was another one, and it fell too, so I was really scared they were gonna fall on me & that's why I wanted to open my eyes! then, there was a big fat juicy worm in this little nook above my bed (that doesn't exist in real life) and it was inching along toward the opening, and I KNEW it was gonna fall on my head and I was terrified so I couldn't move or open my eyes. I don't think I could breathe very well either.
...I think bugs represent little worries or troubles or something like that... but otherwise, what a weird dream!

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I also had a dream I was in a swimming pool, under water, and was holding my breath but really needed to take in more air but couldn't come up from under the water. and I think I woke up afterwards with asthma. it was scary, like I was tied to the bottom of the pool or something.

paprika!

so I went to see this movie today, Paprika, which was brilliant & beautiful. it's about a group of scientists who create a machine that allows you to share other people's dreams, but then the machine gets stolen by a dream terrorist who tries to merge dreams & reality. intense right?! and how perfect for this dream-based blog! well, it was really really good and I encourage everyone to see it. I don't think it's in any theaters anymore, except for maybe a handful or so, but if you see that it's playing check it out, it's well worth it. the visuals are stunning, the story is really moving & interesting (the underlying theme has to do with people not being able to control science and then having science take over), and the music is really great too.
here's a trailer:

just two small scenes of a multi-scene dream

I dreamt that I was talking to M, this person (whom, in waking life, I hung out with during a specific period of time in my past). I was talking to him via a long distance phone call, but I could literally see him while talking to me and was aware of my own presence, as if I was witnessing the situation from a removed position yet coincidingly involved in it personally...unlike a real-life, old-fashioned phone conversation, obviously.

It's not clear how the phone conversation began or developed, but at one point in the conversation, I said something sassy. Trying to look out for him and show some care, I said something like, "you better not [something about drinking or doing something that was a bad habit] anymore." M got seriously mad at me, saying something along the lines that I had no place or right to tell him what he should or shouldn't do. Immediately sensing that he misinterpreted my sass, I explained desperately that I said what I did because I cared about him.

Now, the weird correlation about this part of my dream to my waking life is 1) The night of the dream, my roommate L and I had a semi-housewarming dinner party, during which her man P was telling K, a friend, not to drink anymore. I questioned why P was so emphatic and enthusiastic about watching K's drinking, since K did not seem to drink more than anyone else and was not out of control behavior-wise. The reason was of course that K looked like he wanted to upchuck after he sipped some tequila, is a lightweight when it comes to drinking, and last but not least, because P cares. 2) I really did have a long distance phone conversation with M more than a year ago, not about his habits or behavior tho, but about me making amends to our past and us being friends. During this conversation he actually did firmly assert that I had no right to say or argue about what was the topic at hand, which was an issue of emotions.

Why these two waking life correlations meshed together to form this dream? I don't know exactly yet.

Why M was in this dream, even though I have not seen him in approximately six years and have not had the privilege of engaging in regular, amiable contact with him for some time? Well, strangely enough, he appears very occasionally but persistently in my dreams, sometimes at the most unexpected times, when perhaps I had forgotten him altogether in my conscious life.

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Another part of my dream involved Thom Yorke and I watching Feivel Goes West in a movie theater and the song "Somewhere Out There" playing on the screen. In my dream, Thom Yorke (who I suspect was a guise for my waking life friend V*), had recorded a song that I already knew of that was inspired by "Somewhere Out There," but when we watched the film together, I understood why he made his song. And I tilted my head on his shoulder in response to realizing the meaning of it.

so weird.

*I make this connection, because in waking life there is a song that V shared with me that had an emotional effect on him, which he could not figure out the reason for. I tried to guess, and on my own, would wonder when I heard the song or thought of it why it was significant or powerful for him. The song, however, is from a musical and not from Feivel Goes West. But strangely enough, V actually asked me to sing "Somewhere Out There" with him, one time--I forget if it was the same time or a different occasion. The dream elements are cohesive though.